Sixth Explosion

[alittleblackmagic]

Hmmmmmmmmm.  If it worked for her . . . . . . .

[Knock knock knock! Palom is at YOUR door! No, it doesn't matter who you are or where you live.  Unless you're Crazy Scarf-Eye-Killy Person.  And Crazy Maya-Hating Person.  And even that woman who killed Crazy Maya-Hating Person.  Asura, Matt Engarde, and Sakuya's houses will be skipped.]

Hiya! My name is Palom, and it's a real pleasure to meet you even if I've already met you before and even if I'm lying out of my teeth. I'm going door-to-door collecting delicious sweets, candies, and pastries to assist the children of the neighborhood in their heroic work to turn into sugar crazed addicts escape this town.

Would you have any such things you wouldn't mind parting with? Anything would be a great help!  Urgh, how does she manage to get that heart hanging over her head?  I'm gonna have to settle with a   Lalalala~ Hearts and flowers ~ La ~

[Do you have the heart to say 'no' to this excruciatingly sort-of adorable boy?]

((With sincere apologies to Hustino.))

Comments

[bustydefense.livejournal.com]

[ilu so much. Too bad Mia can't comment on this.]

I'll fix it!

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

[When Mia wakes up the next day, Palom is at her bedroom door with a sack and a wide grin.]

Rise and shine, mom!

I've been collecting donations for the Kids Escaping Mayfield Fund! Would you like to give delicious candies, sweets, and pastries to your adorable son and a very good cause?

[heartofheaven.livejournal.com]

Oh... hello. Candy, huh? Um, how is that supposed to help you escape?

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

[Luckily, Palom has expected this question.]

Not to worry, ma'am, the answer to your question is forthcoming. Behold! A chart!

[It is a nicely drawn sketch of two stick figures -- One droopy, with the thought balloon, "Boy am I hungry I am so lame I cannot even draw a proper hole". The other has developed a sixteen pack, with the thought balloon, "Wow I am so energized I think I could even escape from this town!" The second one is labeled 'Simon', the first 'Relm'.]

As you can see, you would be contributing to a very, very good cause.

[grey-of-heart.livejournal.com]

"Uh, hullo. I'd have to look..." Grant looks back over his shoulder. He hasn't been in the kitchen for longer than ten minutes yet. What's with children going door to door and asking for things? This place gets odder with each passing minute.

"You can come in if you like. Erm. I'll be a moment or three."

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

OK! I'll wait in the kitchen, mister. Take your time! We of the KE . . . uhh. KEMC understand that the worker of today is busy, busy, busy.

[Clearly, Palom had never heard the tale of the Creepy Old Man Who Lured Little Boys In Who Were Subsequently Never Seen Again.]

[kol-shevik.livejournal.com]

[Standing in the doorway, staring at Palom. Staring into his begging little soul.]

...Are you calling Russia fat?

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

[Palom is oblivious.]

No, sir, I would say you are pleasantly prepared for any long winter famines that may come your way. The children of this neighborhood, though, sadly, are not. Any donation you may offer would be greatly appreciated, sir!

[ones-a-job.livejournal.com]

[No, but here was a cup of coffee. It puts hair on yer chest. Door slam.]

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

. . .

*knock, knock, knock*

Sir and/or madam? I am afraid we cannot accept liquid donations at this time, since they tend to run out the bottom of the paper sack and also because it is difficult to distribute evenly without a measuring cup.

[idkmybffblastia.livejournal.com]

More of you? We don't want any!

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

Good! Cause I'm not selling anything, I'm taking. Got anything you'd like to donate?

Though, actually, you kinda are a kid so it defeats the purpose a little. Oh, well.

[miss-enma-ai.livejournal.com]

There is an organization of children?

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

There is now! We're a highly respectable organization since August 14th, and I am, of course, a founding member.

[singmeundead.livejournal.com]

[Vorpal looks the kid up and down and smirks.]

Have ya had your dinner yet?

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

Umm. No, but the schoolteacher says I shouldn't eat at strange people's houses or go into white vans driven by old men filled with candy which is why I'm going around collecting it instead.

[properwhitemage.livejournal.com]

[She spots him walking down the street like an innocent, civic-minded kid. That is HIGHLY SUSPICIOUS.]

Palom, what are you doing?

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

N-Nothing, sis! I'm just . . .

[He quickly hides the sacks of candy behind his back. This does not work very well, as they are almost as large as he is.]

Collecting. Collecting old bottles to recycle, yup.

[badend-syndrome.livejournal.com]

Hauu~. I really don't know if I'm allowed to give you anything, nano desu. Also, how is candy and sweets supposed to help anybody escape?

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

Aha!

[And of course, Palom has whipped out yet another chart. This one is actually different, though -- It's a flow chart with only four bubbles. 'Hoarding Candy' ---> 'No More Hunger' ---> 'Less Likely To Break' ---> 'Success!']

You see? And it's fine. I'm sure your parents would agree.

[see-time-pass.livejournal.com]

Your lying needs a great deal of work.

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

W-What!? How so?! N-Not that I'm lying, of course.

[in-florescence.livejournal.com]

[Knowing smile. Oh you're so cute.]

Pastries and sweets to help what now?

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

The Kids Escaping Mayfield Charity! It's an organization of children dedicated to leaving this town ASAP.

[from-thesea.livejournal.com]

..

Does that mean I can have some when you finish gathering food?

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

Sure, of course. You're a kid, right? I'm gonna distribute the loot I get after I finish going house to house.

[1dashingrogue.livejournal.com]

...

...

No.

[He's not going to slam the door, but close it quietly, unlike other neighbors.]

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

. . .

*knock knock knock*

Excuse me, sir! Does this mean you do not want to make starving children happy and make a difference in the lives of the poor children trapped in this nightmare of a town?

[hugs-arent-free.livejournal.com]

Muu. Are you actually getting candy from people?

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

Actually, yeah! Don't worry, I'll spread it around later. You count as a kid even if you've been that age for 20 years or whatever.

[paradoxdestined.livejournal.com]

... ... ... ... [He's just going to stare at you in general disapproval.]

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

[It's better than coffee or antifreeze. Palom puts on his brightest smile and his most professional demeanor.]

Good afternoon, sir or ma . . . Uh. Sir. On behalf of the children of Mayfield, I'd like to, umm. Inquire if you wish . . . if you wish to donate to the . . . to the KEQ . . . Z . . .

Could you blink, sir? It's kinda creepy.

[crazyclownwoman.livejournal.com]

...

We don't have any.

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

. . .

Are you sure, ma'am?

[snackaholictank.livejournal.com]

*Shiraasan stares at the loot, wide-eyed. Holy crap Palom*

...

You'd better not keep all of that for yourself.

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

Of course not! Here, I got you a muffin.

*tosses her the muffin he got from Tifa*

And you can have some of the candy, too.

[rainbowbrush.livejournal.com]

You are such a liar.

[prodigious-mage.livejournal.com]

What! No I'm not. I was even going to let you have some, but I'm starting to change my mind.